2015 is almost over and it is that time of the year for me
to have a recap of things that happened this year. 2015 has been a really tough year for my
family and I. My grandmother’s passing was very unexpected although she has
been diagnosed with a 4th stage cancer last year but we are not
prepared or even has the slightest thought of losing her forever. Memories
stayed but the fact that she is no longer around is really dreadful. I have
countless of night crying myself to sleep whenever I miss her. I’ve spend
almost 20 years of my life living with her, and now that she’s gone I just
couldn’t think straight sometime. I do face some depression a few times but I
keep it to myself. Because I am not the type of person that easily share my
deepest and darkest thoughts.
There are things that I glad I did, and there are some that
I regret doing. But life itself is a learning process. Without losing, winning
actually means nothing. I’ve gotten myself a tattoo, finally joined the Sarawak
Bloggers Society, my laptop broke and I got a new one, semester 2 was fucked up
which I am hoping semester 3 wont suck that much (final exam is less than a
week), my music preference changes over time, Britney Spears still is and
always be my idol and I have a new baby brother (Kenneth Melvin).
Basically a lot of thing had happened. I don’t know if I am
still the same person I was a year ago or maybe I changed a lot. I don’t feel
anything changes around me, except I’ve moved into a new house and the
neighbourhood is so peaceful.
As for love life, oh God, that area is not my expertise. A
lot of my friends are getting together with each other and all I can do is just
be happy for them. I have a bad record when it comes to this. Maybe I was
destined to be forever alone till I die. Maybe my funeral won’t have a wake
since only a few people would come to it. I admit that I am a very bad person or even
a friend. I have bipolar issue with myself.
I just hope that 2016 will be the year where everything is
working well enough for me, my family and everyone around me.
Till then,
Bryan Marshall.
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